Orwell Was Right

As Atrios and Pudentilla have already commented, the administration has discovered an ingenious solution to the deficit problem, according to the Washington Post:

Republican budget writers say they may have found a way to cut the federal deficit even if they borrow hundreds of billions more to overhaul the Social Security system: Don't count all that new borrowing.

As they lay the groundwork for what will probably be a controversial fight over Social Security, Republican lawmakers and the Bush administration are examining a number of accounting strategies that would allow the expensive transition to a partially privatized Social Security system without -- at least on paper -- expanding the country's record annual budget deficits. The strategies include, for example, moving the costs of Social Security reform "off-budget" so they are not counted against the government's yearly shortfall.

Also announced were several more efforts at what the administration is calling the New Transparency:

• Instead of counting unemployment, the Bureau of Labor Statistics will now count people who won't get off their fat asses and get a job; right now there are 763 of them, and they know where you live.
• Drug dealers will be reclassified as entrepreneurs and included as providers under the new Medicare prescription drug plan (which is working wonderfully, by the way).
• The Bill of Rights will be replaced by the Ten Commandments; there are ten, and no one will notice anyway.
• Since the federal judiciary is populated by trial lawyers, it will be disbanded and court cases will be decided using the BCS formula for college bowl games.

Enjoy!

Comments

[unrelatedwaffle]

Those lazy asses had better watch out, because pretty soon they'll be cannon fodder for the cultural elite.

"Burn the lazy!"

Talk about selling a man the rope to hang himself with.

[Patrick]

You forgot to mention that they will soon change the currency to oak leaves, so we'll all be veerry rich!

[Ken]

Am I the only one who's wondering if Jeff Skilling has been hired on by the RNC?

[merik]

hello world!